YOU TALK AND I WANT TO HIT YOU

FUCK YOU

THIS IS WHY I DON'T TALK TO YOU, EVER

You stupid piece of shit.

A LIL EXCITED

LETS MAKE DOUBLE BEDS

Not! I am going to have only one bed because it will be my room and I will never have to share a room ever, AT ALL, NEVER EVER AGAIN!

I hate this house, I hate my room and I am slowly beginning to hate its inhabitants. I am so excited to be moving out, I think that is all I'm going to post about from now on. Fuck feelings and hello home interior deco, cute ashtrays under my bed and fairylights.

BROTHER BEAR

I love this photo of Jess! I wonder if she likes it. Well she should, she looks like she doesn't give a fucccck about anything and like she's going to do something bad.

Speaking of something bad, she said she got me a little present today which is good and I think I might know what it is which is bad. Not bad as in it's a bad present but bad as in me and her can act very bad ass with it on friday mornings when we go have breakfast before school when we come in late, yaaaaaaaay. I cannot wait! Let's just say I have burnt myself several times trying to light matches and I feel like the biggest loser carrying a matchbox around. I can't wait! Although I am not letting her use it since she's been getting horrible migraines lately, tut tut.

And here's a picture of the both of us, me pink faced from being silly and perhaps finishing the Passion Pop (HA) and most likely Jess trying to make the eel face.

YOU TOLD A LIE

Are my eyes the coldest blue? You said once that this was true. If it is I don't know what to do. Cause I'm stick with them, and they're stuck on you

Almost everything you said was a lie and I know that it hardly even matters anymore but I just want to know why (no rhyme intended)

I DID NOT SAY WE ONCE

I really need to stop

I threw everything that I knew away and now I cannot feel a thing

JE NE SAIS PAS

I think I've made about three draft posts in the last days that I haven't blogged but I failed to post them all because it didn't really feel right. But now that flickr's got this new photo sharing business, how can I not!? So lately I've been pretty much the worst version of myself possible. "The truth doesn't have versions" says he, so I guess that just makes me a liar: which I am. I should just stop talking all together, I don't ever make any sense. But anyway, all I can think about is learning to speak french and sitting alone in my future room. French films and solitude. That is all I need right now.

GOSH KAREN, I'M SO STUPID

So lately I have been a bit of a sophomore slump. Yknow, the usual lack in one's self/people/wearing the colour salmon (it's a really nice colour but I feel like a fool when I wear my salmon coloured skirt out). I guess all I can say is that I've been in a very weird daze and I know that I've been very vague and complacent (insert every blog I've ever posted) but I don't think I've ever been in this much of a slump before. I'm just thankful that I have friends that know when to just let me be and talk about something completely irrelevant like what we would do if we got attacked by an eel. But hey, despite this post's title, I think I'm finally snapping back into focus. I'm actually considering releasing the emergency noose that is hanging from my ceiling light, I think i might decide to live through year 12 actually. Yes, maybe.

(I cropped it because I'm afraid of judgement, yay)

I handed in my second piece for today. And okay, it's really simple and maybe not as amazing or extravagant (ie. gauche, inks, metal barb-wirey-things, i don't know know what other medias other girls are usuing) as the rest of the class but I got it done and I'm actually half pleased with it. I'm actually not trying to sound like a douche, by half pleased I mean that I wish I hard experimented more with the theme of collage and that maybe I could develop it into a series because as a vce piece it doesn't seem that incredible, but I already have another series of fineliner drawings planned (when I say planned I'm referring to very basic wishful thinking). I showed my teacher the piece I handed up today and she didn't slap me across the face in disgust so I take that as a good sign and she also said that I could turn it into a series later if i had time after my third piece. She gave us back our folios today and she was in a freakishly happy mood, I honestly thought it was a trick. When she said she was thoroughly happy with everyone's folios I didn't know whether to smile or not because I felt like she was going to add a huge fat 'but' to the end but she didn't. So I just looked away, incase it really was a trick and she would penalize us for scrappy folios. Honestly, mine isn't u[ to date and I've left alotttt of pages blank and I haven't really experimented that much but she ended the two pages of notes on what i needed to improve with 'keep up the good work', so I'm just going to focus on that as I usually do.

But apart from handing up art and ridding myself of atleast that burden, I think what's really pulled me back up was going to look at all the folios and work at the Rmit Openday in the city yesterday. Okay, so I wanted to pass out numerous times because I was so overwhelmed by all the amazing work and information and yes similar to the Top Arts and Top Design excursion me and my friends freaked out at how we 'didn't stand a chance' compared to the thirty or so people that get into this course but just being surrounded by people with the same passion as me and actually living and breathing the Rmit fashion course, ohhhhh my. As lame as it is, i felt inspired again. Seeing all the beautiful folios, pocket notebooks, sketchpads filled with charcoal and watercolour sketches of pages out of Russh and Steven Stipelman-inspired sketches just made my heart race. Especially after meeting Tammy and Kara: two fashion students and definitely the nicest people in this entire world (well surely out of the whole Rmit building atleast), I just felt so much more at ease. This whole-choose-your-future-and-work-your-hardest-to-get-what-you-want-thing seems so much more real now. They were so nice to me and Julie and I don't even want to go into it here because I'll just sound like a silly school girl gushing about how nice they were, but if they ever do read this I just want to say thankyou so much for talking to us yesterday because it really calmed my nerves about what I wanted to do and made me realize that I need to get back the self confidence that I've lost in myself, because if i can then i can be an amazing Fashion student at Rmit like them. Oh, and I also need to get back into drawing and sticking things into my little notebooks. But anyway, I haven't written a long post like this in so long. I guess I just needed that week to detatch y'know? I don't know if i want to piece myself together after that funny week (smilling again, listening to dolphins because they are unselfish, eating healthier, using a ruler) yet but I do know that for now I'm just going to focus on what course I want to get into and how I'm going to decorate my new room, yay.
(I got screen print this at Rmit brunswick whose campus a absolutely hated because the lady at the Fashion diploma was a complete a-hole and their chai latte tasted like ass but their screen printing studio really cheered me up)

ANGUS AND JULIA STONED

I try really hard to be all Lemonetta-y and stuff but whatever, it's back. I don't want to listen to the playlists i made recently anyway. I don't know why all the videos of Sadder than You sound different to the recording that i have, but oh well it had to be put in. I still like the version that I have more.

I'LL NEVER TALK AGAIN

Well all I know is that I can't listen to Best Coast anymore and I'll have a lot of ripping out to do, sigh all that metallic texter gone to waste. I shouldn't have chanced the good stuff until I knew it was for the best, which it wasn't. And the playlists too, I'll give it a week.